I know you think this costume would be so cute if I'd just wear that ruffly collar around my neck. Since my Grandma made the costume for my cousin a few years ago, I'm sure it would mean a lot to her, too...if I'd just wear that collar.
The thing is, mom, that collar creeps me out. I can see it out of the corner of my eye when it's around my neck and it makes me claustrophobic. It might scratch me or rub up against my cheek, or the ribbon might rub my neck. I really can't take that chance, mom. And honestly, I think it makes me look even more like a girl than my long hair (which you are not cutting anytime soon, by the way). I think I was nice enough to let you put some clown cheeks on me with makeup, which in itself is a mystery to me because doesn't it just make me look more girly?
So you will have to settle for the collarless, ruffle-less clown this year. Sorry. At least I let you talk me in to wearing the darn thing.
"I want to wear this football uniform every Halloween. Forever."