Monday, April 30, 2007

Supermom sssstrikes again

I can't take much in the way of varmints. It was part of Husband's vows at our wedding "to love, honor, and remove all outside creatures to the outdoors or the trashcan, the latter of which can only occur if said creature is dead." Translation: I do NOT kill bugs or anything else. Ever.

Unless of course Husband is at work and unavailable to live up to his vow, like today. I can barely even type it since I get the willies every time I think about it. In our garage. I say "we" but really it was me and the boys, and they were still strapped in their carseats when I noticed the intruder. Otherwise, the s. (I can't seem to type it again) would probably be running for its life from a stick.

Let me just say, I would have taken a pic of the s. but I was too horrified. All I could think about was the possibility of the s. chasing me as I leapt over it to the door to get a broom. Then I realized, I'm NOT using the same broom as I use to sweep our kitchen floor, so I had to leap over it again to get to the garage broom. Luckily we have about five garage brooms (somehow they seem to be multiplying) so I grabbed the biggest one I could find. Straw bristles, curved on the end from so much use...oh, yeah, this baby would work.

So I went back to the s. amid "what you doing, Mommy"s from the car and prepared to sweep it out of the garage. The s. curled up immediately (ewwwwww!!) and with one amazing swoop I launched him to the end of the driveway like a hockey puck on an icerink. Then another swoop into the street, then across the street to the office building's parking lot, then for good measure to the grassy area next to it.

Ahhhh, my work was done and now I'm happy to report I have not seen the s. again. I couldn't, however, bring myself to let the broom back into the garage so it is currently propped up outside. Where it will remain forever.

So after my heroics I walked back up to the car and Son 1 was all questions:

"What did you do Mommy?"

"I just showed a snake his new home."


"Because I don't like snakes."

"Oh. I like snakes."

You'll learn, my boy, you'll learn.

P.S. The size of the snake, I'm sure you want to know, wasn't much bigger than a large earthworm. But it was ferocious.

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

WFMW: Cheap, better giftwrap

Use discount fabric for wrapping gifts.

I wrapped this birthday gift (a puzzle in a box) for under $3. The three-year-old gets the gift and the mom gets a yard of fabric with a fun "boy print" to do with as she pleases: pajama pants for her son, placemats, blanket, etc. The fabric was $2 a yard and the ribbon was also from the clearance rack, for 50 cents. I didn't even use tape to wrap it.

For the mother of Works for Me Wednesday, visit Shannon.

Monday, April 23, 2007

Weightloss Inspiration

We all need it at one time or another: a little ditty about losing weight to make us feel not so miserable about having to deprive ourselves. Well, OK, maybe I'm the one that needs it right now. I've been struggling to lose my baby weight for, uh, let's see, my youngest son is saying words now. (How long, by the way, is it okay to call it "baby weight?")

And while I'm on my soapbox (what, you didn't see me climb up?) let me just say that if "breastfeeding makes post-baby weight loss happen faster" actually came true for me, I'd be borrowing clothes from Calista Flockhart. (Oh, how '90s of me: I meant Nicole Richey). I nursed both my boys every bit of 13 months each and yet I still struggle.

Anyway, I've been doing Weight Watchers lately, and our meeting leader bestowed this gem on us last week. Even if you don't do WW, you may find it inspiring enough to put down that Snickers...

author unknown

Tuesday evening after Weight Watchers
That piece of cake I saved is near.
One big slice, I have no fear.
Besides, no pounds will even show.
I've got seven days to go.

Time for shopping, to the mall we go.
Have a pizza special, it’s cheaper you know.
I’ll walk it off, I’ll get in gear.
Six days to go, no weigh-in near.

I think I’ll skip my tuna lunch.
A hamburger and fries is what I’ll munch.
Tuna’s getting expensive you know.
Besides, I’ve got five days to go.

For breakfast, one egg, toast and juice.
But the kids left their pancakes, what’s the use?
With inflation, to waste is a sin.
Besides, it’s four days until I weigh in.

This weekend will be really rough.
Those restaurant menus are really tough.
I’ll work the steak off when I go to the gym.
I have three days until I weigh in.

For breakfast, I’ll just have coffee today.
Maybe I’ll lose a little more that way.
At supper, a little bit I will eat.
In just two days that scale I meet.

Now my nerves are really a wreck.
I’m stressed, so I eat, what the heck.
I need to lose a pound tonight.
One day to go, will it be all right?

I don’t want to face that scale today.
Will a trip to the john save the day?
I gained two pounds, wouldn’t you know?
Guess I didn’t have seven days to go!

The greatest thing you have is the 24 hours directly in front of you. Today you can succeed.

Thursday, April 12, 2007

Overheard: So that's how it's going to be...

Mommy: Do you love your mommy?

Son 1: Yes, but I don't like you.

Mommy: You don't?

Son 1: No, I like Daddy.

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

WFMW: Snack Trap

If ya'll have toddlers, you really need to check out the Snack Trap at One Step Ahead. I am not a baby-gadget person; I shun useless things like this with a vengeance. But the Snack Trap is well worth its five bucks: fill it with Cheerios and hand it to your little one and they can carry it around the living room without spilling. And it's great for traveling, too.

The Snack Trap works for me! For more great tips, visit Shannon.

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

"Judge not," etc., but at least writing isn't my JOB

Friday's edition of my local paper. Scary I paid for it.